May 2009
5 posts
Why do grown ass men always have little kid...
No but seriously, why is that? Are they bad with their hands or is it an aesthetic perception thing? And what does it mean that I write like one?
Awkward
Ideas for Awkward Ambushes:
1) Voicemail carriers should inform callers when the party they call hits ignore and sends them straight to voicemail. “This party has chosen to ignore your call. Please leave a message. … WUTUp wutup my lovahs - I’m away from my phone, but I will give you a call right back if you leave it at the beeeeeeep.”
2) Requesting relationship status...
I is a perfectionist. Nom nom nom.
Who would ever want to love a perfect person? What risk is there in that? What could you possibly ever provide them? Wutup world, brilliant lack of perfection seeks lover from past life, with unfinished business.
Swiss Miss
Having worked in various real estate, publishing, capital management and other corporate incaranations around New York, I have discovered a standard asset at each office: Swiss Miss Hot Chocolate with Marshmallows. Never have I seen the stand alone hot chocolate sans mallow. Corporate America pro: endless freeze dried marshmallows. Corporate America con: Corporate America. I mean, that’s...